realised...

you blamed god when bad things happened to you
the more you tried to forget abt it the more you couldn't stop thinking abt it
you felt depressed and wish the world would end for you
you felt depressed yet you wanna show that you're strong
by laughing though you're depressed
and you laughed louder when you're more depressed
laughed til the tears welled up and you wonder if its tears of joy or depression
you felt like you're sinking deeper and deeper into the sea of blues
you looked at others swirling around you and thought every of them was better off than you
dragging your feet, your legs felt heavy
your head felt heavy
your heart felt heavy
you wish that you could just collapse on the ground and never woke up
you thought about death
and how easy it was to die
yet you saw the love ones out there waiting for you
how could you bear to leave them
you wanna share their happeniness
you wanna share their sorrows
you never know, they might even be more depressed than you're.

think lots of pple experienced that, and i'm definitely one of them